Adjusting and its difficulties – Trashing Men/Guys



I have been single for twelve days to be exact (and counting). Twelve days in which I have laughed, I have cried, I have learned and experienced new things about myself, have reconnected with friends again, but mostly, have been disappointed by men. During these last twelve days, in which I have been publicly single, men have just been trying to attack me, like I am some sort of prey. Maybe it was like this before I got into this relationship -I don’t remember it being that way- or maybe guys just think I’m a desperate single girl looking for a rebound. Whatever the case for their behavior, it disgusts me, it saddens me, and it angers me deeply.

I was isolated from my friends -or the world- for almost a year. I stopped talking to every guy/girl friend I ever had, including my guy best friend of over three years. So not worth it, but it happened. After leaving my ex, all I wanted to do was get back into my social circle, if there was still any. And if not, look for another one that fitted more who I am now. I spoke to Guy friends just as I did to my girl friends, or who I thought were my friends, whom I had known over years. Half of them tried to made a pass at me. One of them, whom I have known for over FIVE years (and had never been disrespectful to me before) was so disrespectful he implied we would start dating when he came back, on fuck*ng January 2nd. Dude, seriously? Not only that, but he also implied we should have sex. What the fuck? Needless to say, I stopped talking to him. I stopped talking to him and all the others, not before setting them straight.

He is but one of the examples I have of why men are disgusting. Maybe this happens just in my country, in which there seems to be no decency or respect. Maybe it does not (because two of the subjects were American). Maybe men are “just made that way”. Maybe that’s what they were taught to do when a girl near them goes through a break-up. Maybe they think I am the type of girl that will just jump into bed with the first asshole that crosses her path, Yeah.. No. I am not one of the girls that goes through the “rebound” stage. I have not gone crazy and wild and started partying. I have barely left my house. Last thing I want right now -or ever- is to have a bunch ofΒ babosos disrespect me. It’s disgusting. It’s pathetic. It’s disrespectful. It saddens me, and I feel sorry for them. It makes me want to slap them, hard.

It looks like now I will start realizing just how many guy FRIENDS I really ever had.


*I’m not saying all men are like this.





14 thoughts on “Adjusting and its difficulties – Trashing Men/Guys

  1. Sorry to hear your are having that experience. I am certain that your beauty at times bring unwanted attention. I can’t fault any guy for wanting to get to know you but I believe men should always be gentlemen and show proper respect. Being male does not always equal being a man. It sounds like you have experienced boys masquerading as men. Don’t let the negative experiences dampen that attractive glow that you have. You will always encounter guys that are unworthy of your gift but stay positive. Continue to write, I know it is therapeutic. Thanks for sharing your feelings.

  2. Some people are more interested in what you are than who you are. They are more interested in the container than its contents, more interested in the body than the soul. The treasures of our soul consist of our individual perspective, our individual feelings, and our individual expression of who we are. These individual things are what make up our unique gift to the world. Your gift is what makes you unique from every other person on the earth. A true lover takes the time to know and embrace your gift.

      1. sigh πŸ™‚
        you failed in this test… he, he

        this is the definition of the word in “a contemptibly naive, fatuous, foolish, or inconsequential person”
        you see, it could be anyone… i think everyone sees a certain person in this light, even without getting to know them…
        so, yes, some men are jerks, cause they are foolish…

        but i think you meant the other kind of jerk πŸ˜›
        “a selfish, manipulative man who sees women as little more then sexual conquests to brag about to their buddies or mere objects that are there for their personal pleasure.”
        – if you meant this, then yes, it’s usually the really immature ones who turn out like this. they were probably hurt or rejected by someone they liked and to take revenge they start using anyone and everyone…
        I don’t use people… πŸ™‚ it is not in my character to be so fake. I would die of shame if I did something like that.

        btw, there are women who are jerks too, these days. agreed?

      2. I agree, there are women that are bitches/jerks.

        I did not mean it in any definition of the word, I meant it in “Disrespectful men who would not take into consideration the girl’s current feelings and who would dare to hit on her after she got out of a long, committed relationship,” with a splash of “And obviously, hit on her in every sexual context of the way”

        If I failed, I am glad. At least I failed for staying true to what I believe in πŸ˜€

      3. Okay, I understand better what you mean now… πŸ™‚
        Yes, men like that are trying to take advantage of your weakness..
        or maybe they think they will help you get over sooner… :-/ – i know it’s stupid… but the fact remains they must have been interested in you all along…

        my last “proper” πŸ™‚ relationship also was something like this..
        she had some close guy friends… and for some unavoidable reasons, I had to let her go… but hardly a week after that, one of her best friends tried to make out with her…
        partly her fault for hanging out that much with him, but then, I knew all along he was into her… she just seemed to ignore it…
        also, I know she might have let him take that step just to get back at me 😦

        Anyway, I think you’re talking about guys like that. You are right… It is disgusting to take advantage of someone in that position.

        (oh, and about the ex and that guy. they’re together now… πŸ™‚ Life. Crazy things happen. When she told me, I said, “Finally.” He, he. Cause they did get along very well.)

      4. WOW!!! that was messed up.!!

        but yeah that happened to me as well, My ex best friend (guy) tried to get with me after I ended my last relationship. After over 3 years of friendship, he claimed to be completely in love with me…
        I was like .. whaaaat?
        But we didn’t end up together,
        we ended up not speaking at all.

        But yeah, life happens and stuff like this happens and people go crazy and we have to move on.

        Yes, I meant that type. They probably thought I was the type to look for rebound guys or something
        So not my thing anymore.
        I’m glad you understand now

      5. I think we ought to blame the movies
        Have you seen the crazy things that happen there.. πŸ™‚ he, he
        Like on the wedding day, suddenly the hero or heroine will realize they love someone else and just leave everything and go to them…
        the worst part… we are so caught up in the story, we think it is so touching and nice… 😦
        it is so fickle actually… people changing their minds like that
        or suddenly realizing who they truly love..
        some rom-coms are just stupid.
        I think your ex friend also must have thought he had a chance because of seeing one of these crack movies…
        it’s like he’s saying that for all those 3 years, he was not sure, and then cause you are single, now he is… what madness… opportunists.

      6. HAHAHAAHAHAH you are funny.. No, I was single for most of those 3 years, and when we started being friends he confessed to me that he liked me since he first saw me, but he was in a committed relationship So I was like ok, brushed it off, and we became friends. What I think happened was that when he got to truly know me he fell in love with me and felt more than just lust towards my body.

        But then again, we’ll never truly know haha

        haha crack movies…

      7. my gosh, you are so descriptive…
        so were you okay that he had a thing for you even when he was seeing someone else?
        hmm, that is kinda playing with fire na πŸ™‚
        cause he was already cheating on her then,,,
        or did he make it sound very innocent?

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